Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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