I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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