To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
