well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
