should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize