Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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