I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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