I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Randomize
