We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I feel great
I just peed on a car
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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