Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize