How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize