I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Who died my cat blue again?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
