she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
