he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
We were destined to go to rehab together
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
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