Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
