Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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