Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Randomize
