This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize