I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
