Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize