He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
