She went from zero to smokin in five shots
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
