Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
