Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
