do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
