I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
