she was so not down for the gang bang
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
