Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
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