can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
