ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
