So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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