we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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