All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
