i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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