I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
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