Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize