The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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