Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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