Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
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