Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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