Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
When did angry sex become our thing?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
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