butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
