it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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