When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Randomize
