I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
