in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
no, he came in my armpit
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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