So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
My balls are so social today.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
i out mim tonsoeep
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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