Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
