also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
