They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
