you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
