That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
